Sleep, a little warfare and what God wants for Christmas...

I’ll sleep when I’m dead.
But seriously, give me five more minutes.

After two hours of sleep for the second day in a row I was seriously considering re-considering my sleep when I’m dead philosophy. I spent the weekend doing mission work in New Orleans and I don’t have anything to say in this blog, but my heart is heavy for what I’ve seen this weekend; so I write.

I first noticed the spiritual warfare during the drive down on Friday. I started praying not only for myself but also for the entire one hundred and thirty-four of us headed into the valley of darkness. (I’m allowed a little creative explanation aren’t I?)

Spiritual warfare is an interesting thing. It is a battle that I look forward to fighting when I am prepared (suited up in the armor of God as described in Ephesians 6.) The battle means that I am making a difference, so it’s a comfort. When I’m not prepared I get ripped to shreds.
I was getting used to living in the bubble of the University of Mobile, my home for the next 3 years is for lack of a better term “anointed real estate.” This is an institution founded on the principles of Christianity and I believe that God blesses it as such, spiritual warfare is a piece of cake on this campus compared to a city so overcome by powers beyond what we see.
There is a war going on, and a place like New Orleans is an intense place to be.

God did not use me on the trip as much as I hoped he would, I am unafraid to go talk to people, I don’t care if they have a gun, they need the message just as much as any other sinner like those of us who were going to help. So… I had hoped God would use me to do such a thing as that and see someone radically saved through me et cetera et cetera….

I missed the point, and God used me, but I did (and still) do not understand why he would hold me back from talking to certain people or saying certain things that I know would make a difference.
His plan is bigger… and I work for him.

I was talking to a friend the first night and a thought came to me as we discussed the group of students on this mission.
“What would happen if we had 134 students with an Isaiah 26:8 passionate desire for the glory of Christ on earth?
What would happen if these few walked in to the French quarter with boldness and talked to every single person they met on the street without fear, and with such boldness that people could not help but notice. There is something different….
What would happen if we forgot about ourselves and walked in union with the Holy Spirit and could take captive our thoughts to the detail of saying exactly what God told us to do?”

We did not try to answer.

And now I apply this to you.

What would happen if you took captive every thought and walked close enough with the Lord to know exactly what he was saying?
What would happen if you forgot yourself, your desires, your love for anything but Christ and lived for that alone?

I leave the answer to you.

Remember I am always here for commentary on these blogs, or if you need someone to talk to, realize that as a reader of these thoughts you know me more intimately than many people who see me everyday. I guess that makes us good friends, I’d love to hear what you think of these, or what you want to hear a blog about.

Psalm 86:11

-Israel

The Great Romance, Choices and An Open Book in a Foreign Language

I could try to describe to you the feelings of my heart, yet it would fall magnificently short of my goal of making my soul an open book. Of course, our souls were not designed to be open books with anyone but our creator. That is part of the great romance. To you, I'm just an open book in a foreign language.
I’m really starting to despise romance, not the great romance, but the elementary concept of it that people (children in a grown up shell) perceive as “romance.” Romance is a much deeper concept than our feeble pursuits can do justice to. To romance is a choice; we often make that choice without fully understanding the consequences and implications.

If I were to give my heart to someone then decide that was a mistake I can never go back on that. When you give your heart to someone the only way to get back what you’ve given is to tear it off.
You get a scar that will never go away.
You want to romance. Ok, but be ready to break your heart in two.
God is so easily mis-understood in this area, just because you are at peace around a person doesn’t mean God is saying “go out with them” you make the choice.
Not God.
Yea I said it.
You make the choice.
Choose wisely.

My dearest friend sees my problems before I do pretty much every time, I really have no methods for seeking out said imperfections. I throw my heart into everything I do; I refuse to hold back anything. If I hold back I can miss an opportunity or simply hold back what I can give. This has a key downfall. When people continue to make the same foolish mistake over and over and over again I start to get bitter. How can people be so stupid?
Blah, I wonder if Jesus asked the same question, or if he was so fully God that he always loved them, and it never crossed his mind.

It crosses my mind in some form or another every time I look in their eyes. Even when I think in love, it always crosses my mind, why don’t they just fix it?

I can handle this. There is something else that renders me weaker in the situations God puts me in.
Pride? Maybe.
The farther I go the more I realize that I have so much farther to go.
I’m tired.
I have much to do.
I love every minute of it.


I feel I should explain the “Great Romance.”
Some of you already understand just by the reference I have made, but it is a very deep subject so it makes me feel better to write it out, so I myself understand it as much as you.
The romance is the relationship between God and us. It is the relationship that makes the universe turn. That gives us joy and purpose and makes us love in a way we never could under our own greatest desire.
How does he love?
He chooses
He pursues
He rescues
He woos
He protects
He lavishes

Those of you that have read the circle trilogy by Ted Dekker know what I am talking about now, no, I am not copying him, he just gave me an easier way to explain something bigger than the words I could write for you here.
He pursues, do you understand what this means to us? This is the basis of a Christian life. The God who created the universe, who counts the stars and knows them all by name, who hangs the earth on nothing, who knows the number of hairs on your head, he desires a relationship with you! Even as I sit here in physical science class God desires a relationship with me, and that romance continues.

I feel I should edit this a little for guys, because if you’re a guy and you are not gay then this doesn’t make as much sense to you.
God created you, so he loves you.
Because he loves you he wants to know you
He already knows you because he made you
But isn’t a relationship better if it works both ways?

So right now what we have is just a really intimate manly relationship. So why call it romance? Romance is defined as treating someone differently then others because of your relationship. Well that makes sense.
So because God knows you uniquely he desires an equally unique relationship with you.
An equally unique relationship with the one who created you, with the one whom the thunder and lightning are but an illustration of a fraction of his glory, a romance in the greatest sense of the word.
Cool.

In a good romantic relationship both people are more concerned about the other than themselves. It’s the same way with God. He is concerned with every minute aspect of your life.
He protects and he lavishes, because he loves you, and when you love someone you love to lavish them, to protect them, when your heart is tied to someone completely you would give anything for them.
Anything.
Like your only son
I’m not talking about an ordinary romance, God loves YOU so much that he gave his only son. Yet we still live for ourselves like it’s about us. It’s not! That’s not how a romance works! It is about him! It is about worship and what God has in mind.
Jesus said, “if you love me you will obey my commandments.”
There are no ifs ands or buts there.
If you love him you will obey his commandments.
Period.
He loves you.
Do you love him?

College, William Wallace, and A Whole New World!

I just worked a Pocahantas Song into a blog. Wow....
College starts in 3 weeks.

To quote Scott Bakula

"Oh boy."

It's not that I'm scared. Or particularly nervous. I'm more... cautious.
Which I guess makes me an odd combination of scared, nervous, bold, confused, overwhelmed, underwhelmed, brave, stupid, wise, courageous and hungry.

(I'm thinkin' Arby's)

Ok, ok, but seriously.
A new chapter of life begins on August the eleventh.

This is a thought that intrigues like no other.
That little voice in your head that giggles and says "freedom!" In a way only vaguely reminiscent of William Wallace.

The yearning for freedom is something embedded in your DNA from day one. A yearning some control better than others. (You ever see those kids with a leash? I understand them completely.)

I've been writing this blog for two weeks, I can never get it how I want it, to portray what's on my heart in words. But of course, that is the problem of every blog.

It's nearly midnight friday night, I'm getting up soon to move. I couldn't sleep if I wanted to.

The way we face this new step will effect the rest of our lives.
Boldly.
Hesitantly.
Regretfully.
How do you define yourself?
How do you want to begin?

I'm walking boldly, no hesitation, no regret.
I could easily slip into that, just like anyone could.
But, greater is he who is in me than he who in the world.
Forgive the christianese but I love the poetry in the verse.

I wrote a goodbye note to my best and closest friend today, it started as this blog as I organized the thought, but there were so many inside jokes and stuff it doesn't make for a public thing.
Anyway, I closed the letter with this statement:

I am not perfect.
But I will stand.
I will stand as the man that I am becoming, not as who I am.
I will stand not without fear, but with courage to accomplish anything.
I will stand.


-So I get a new start. I will screw up, many people will not see me as who I am, and it will take so long to get friends at the level of what I have had.
Bring it on.

Move in Day.
I got on campus about 8 A.M, my roommate Brantley wasn't going to be here for nearly an hour so I got a few helpers (Ram Rush people, a couple of which I knew, now I know most of them.) :-)
They liked my flat screen tv and my rootbeer keg. Thanks to those things I was known around campus by lunchtime. A notable reputation? I don't think so, I'm just the rich kid and not the one who worked for his stuff. And I'm not here just for the party, I'm here for school. And Jesus. I admit... mostly Jesus. If Jesus says skip class I will. hehe

The barbecue on the lawn was fun, met my "Ram Fam" Which is about 15 other freshmen and we get to know each other in closer environment where it's easier to make friends. I've made friends with almost the entire cross country thanks to one guy in my Ram Fam. So I figure it is a pretty good system. :-)

Day 2 (Sunday)
First thing this morning is Rush Hour, which you spend with your Ram Fam.
It sounds like they brainwashed me.
Ram Rush
Ram Fam
Rush Hour (I still think of Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker)

I practically have a new vocabulary, but this is college... so cool. I think.

Worship is flippin amazazing.
Gah, the band that played was awesome.
Period.
Exclamation Point.

Yup. Then the Direct of Campus Ministries Neal Ledbetter and the Director of Campus fun stuff (there's a more official title)
Anyway his name is Buff, and they had a conversing kind of message from Psalm 139.
It was awesome.
That is all.

I just hung out all afternoon and made more friends and stuff.
Then last night the drive-in movie.
More new friends.
You get the idea.
My facebook has lit up like a Christmas tree. lol

So College is definitely a fantastic new experience.
New opportunities.
New friends.
It's amazing.

It's not perfect, frankly (who made up that word anyway)
it's going to be difficult, no one really knows me yet.
Anonymity is fun in it's own way. But I miss sitting across from a friend who will start smiling because they can see a joke cross my mind. I don't even need to say it.

Well, if you'll excuse me. Leave me comments, if you have questions, I'll answer them.

I have much to do. :-)

Go in peace.
-Jason

Thought, Hillsong, and the Motorcycle Squirrel Guy

So another blog.
This one has no deep spiritual motive, it is more to spurn thought within myself.
It's a shame how few people encourage thought these days. There are... 3 people who have ever encouraged me to think.
God Bless them.
Oh wait, he already has.
God rock their face off.
:-)

I got back from Houston yesterday, saw Hillsong United, and to pre-emptively answer your question.
Yea. It was awesome.
Got to meet the band beforehand backstage with about 15 other people, it was pretty cool. I have alot more respect for the band now. They are so humble, they are there for worship, not for anything else.

Phil Dooley spoke. He's my new favorite Australian.
He talked about Harley Davidsons and squirrels.
In the same sentence.
Can you ask for more?
The major point of his message was the complacency of the church-he just used smaller words. Forgive my big-wordage.
(Wordage is in my computers dictionary. Sweet.)
"It seems that the Rock-stars are the ones making a difference in this world instead of the church."
Very true.
I mean, at this point we have heard all this before, but maybe that's God's way of making his point?
Seriously, we hear about it and amen and nod and wait for someone to start some new way to make a difference, we drop a couple extra bucks in a bucket to give some depressed kid a new pair of socks.

We are still missing the point.

The depressed homeless kids in Africa are just a fraction of the mission field.
The mission field starts where you are sitting, and stretches to everywhere you go, to everywhere your influence reaches.
You are called to missions.
Missions is not money in a bucket.
It is you shining your light all around you.
So your reputation precedes not as your reputation, but as one who follows Christ and thus shines his renown wherever you go.

I will get comments on this blog commenting on how good it is and how right I am but if you do that then you've still missed the point. If you post a comment, tell me what you did in your mission field. Tell me what you did to shine.

"AS you are GOING, make DISCIPLES in all nations"

Psalm 78:7
-Jason

The Trip, The Experience, and If This Were an Overdue Library Book....

So... I went to Israel.

Didn't write a blog about it.
Haven't written anything in a while.
Sorry.

Sooo, here's my grasp of the trip, it's short, but this sort of trip is something that effects your soul. That cannot be put into words.
Elie Wiesel said "No one can go to Israel and leave the same way they came."

Truth.

We started in Egypt, saw the pyramids, spent a ridiculous amount of time staring at 5000 year old statues that look like stuff I can get at garage sales for a dollar. Evidently they're a big deal. Okay.
Can I shoot a mummy or something?

Next up was Petra in Jordan, there is a picture on my myspace. www.myspace.com/sirjason
It is a city carved into the rock cliffs. It's pretty cool. It's over a mile down a narrow canyon, very defensible (thus the Left Behind books saying Christians will hide out there in the end times. That is where I would be.)

I loved it, I ran around the cliffs high above the ground. Running as fast as I can-with the risk of falling including much pain, there I am very much at home. I loved it.

Then Israel.

We went to Ein gedi, where David hid from Absalom, there are pictures.
This was one of my favorite places.
It's an Oasis in the middle of the desert. There is a spring at the end of this canyon and the stream flows all the way down with waterfalls and lush greenery and all that kinda stuff.
It is beautiful.

Its a good hike to the top. The rest of my family turned back about halfway up, so I ran up the rest of the way so I could see it. I didn't bring a camera or anything. But that was fine with me.
The trail had been crowded the whole way up, but when I reached the top it was empty.
Quiet.
Peaceful.
Much like it was 3000 years ago when David wrote many of the Psalms. I sat down on a rock at the foot of the largest waterfall. Probably the rock David sat on.
Took a drink from the water.
Same water David drank.
Excuse me while I giggle.

It was a beautiful moment with just me and God in that fantastic little Oasis he created in the middle of the desert.

We drove through where Sodom and Gomorrah were. Look at the no drowning picture. The rock around that is all volcanic.
There is nothing vaguely reminiscent of volcano's for thousands of miles.
Volcanic rock covers nearly 100 miles.
God didn't just destroy Sodom and Gomorrah.
He tore up everything in between.


"Don't make me come down there."

We went on to Jerusalem.
Our Happy Home.

It's an interesting place to say the least. The old city is older than our country, and it's just neat to walk around and experience it.

It changes your perspective of the Bible when you see it for yourself. I haven't just read it.
I was there.

One of the most memorable moments was when we went across the border into Palestine. Which is only a country because they have guns and they say so.
So Israel built a wall in between the two, but it's more of a political thing, only the main roads have checkpoints, the back roads you can get in and out freely.

So we went to where Jesus was born.
There is a big church on top of every single place where something happened save one. We'll get to that place. So we go through the church, into the cave (the manger) where Jesus was born. As we wait in line to go in. (There is always a line.)
We are almost in and we hear singing.
Singing.

Away in a manger no crib for a bed....

Singing to Jesus about his birth.
Where it happened.

One lady kept trying to shush it.
Pharisee.

It was the only time I ever saw a priest smile the whole trip.
I was singing, and crying a little bit.
It was something I will never forget.

We went to all three places where they say he was buried. MY favorite is what the picture is of. It was so perfect.... And it didn't have a big church on top of it. It was how I'd imagined it, except better.

I came home a different person then how I went.
I can't put it into words. But now you've heard my favorite parts. If you want more stories just ask me.
And if you want me to write a blog about something ask, I love input.

Peace
-Jason

Sunburn, Sunsets, And The Difference Between Heaven and Hell

His feet were cold.
When you drag someone out of bed to martyr them, at least give them the justice of wearing their slippers. The Roman soldiers were not so kind.
He sang as they escorted him.
Psalm 113, something he had sung for years on Good Friday.
It bothered the hell out of the Romans.
This was good, he sang louder.

He was aware and had already fully accept what was about to happen. He had never met Jesus, those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength, he'd waited, he was ready.
And he was about to meet Jesus.
The Roman soldiers agreed.
He was still singing when the flames lit.
His feet weren't cold anymore.

It didn't really hurt so much. More like.... sunburn.
When he was a child he had gone to the beach, he remembered the sound of the waves, the glorious, majestic sunsets.
And the sunburn.
It was always worth it.
That sunburn, that pain reminded him of freedom.
He smiled.
The Romans were having a bad day.

He was there for nearly 6 hours.
He sang alot, enjoyed the sunburn.
Freedom.
Haha! Glorious freedom!

He was getting bored.
He looked around at the impatient Romans and smiled again.

"Turn me over I'm done on this side"

They looked around at each other, the commanding officer shrugged, and they obliged the request.

His face was down now, his vision clouded by smoke.
He saw the beach again, the sunset, God's majesty screaming across the heavens.
Somewhere his memory and reality got mixed together.
He was a little child running on the beach, the sudden smoke made him cough and stumble, he fell to the ground, unable to breath.

He looked at the sunset, felt the sunburn, inhaled a deep breath, in the back of his mind he knew it was his last. He had no regrets of his life. His vision clouded again, he couldn't breath.
Couldn't Sing.
But he didn't need to sing anymore, the Angels sang for him
He looked at the sunset, and with his last earthly thought he realized... the sun was the other way.
Glorious.
Freedom.

"Hey Jesus."



-The Martyrdom of St. Lawrence in Rome in 258 A.D, at the age of 33.

Hell is not just a place where you go when you die, it is anywhere that God is not.
But God is everywhere. But what about when people shove him out.
The internment camps in WWII.
War. (With the exception of when your army is led by God)
Just 2 examples for you...
Some people would say St. Lawrence went through Hell to get to Heaven.
No, God was always with him, with the absence of God it would have been Hell for him.
But instead, all he got was a sunburn, and a new appreciation for slippers and sunsets.

In the darkest time of your life, when you go through Hell.
Look around you
God is there.

What I have found...

Is sometimes the difference between Heaven and Hell,

is just a little sunburn.

Peace... be with you
John 20:15
-Jason

Deathbeds, Revolution, and The Final Concerto

Hi.

So at this point the new name has been up for 2 hours and i've already received messages and comments with people delicately asking "What are you smoking and what can I do to help?" Or something related thereof.

I assure I am not literally dying, I'm quite well, in fact God wont let me die. lol Not that I've tried it, but I have too much left to do. And it's cool cause I think Jesus will come back before I die anyway....

So yea... my blog name. I'll get there, I promise.

In a walk with Christ we are called to die to ourselves daily. To give up everything we have. (Mt 10:37-39) What I've discovered is that it takes a while to die the first time. It takes a while to be honest without ourselves and dig things out to put them at our Saviors feet.
There comes a point where you not only say "God here I am"
But you say "God here is my heart, here are my weaknesses and my strengths, take it, make it yours, no matter how much it hurts."

You can see the change....

This is my deathbed
I lie here alone
When I close my eyes tonight
I know I'll be home

This is my deathbed.
The death of fear.
The death of pride
The death of jealousy
The death of complacency

You are not alone.
You are never alone. (John 16:32)


So the moral of this story is simple.
Get on your deathbed.
Quit crawling off the altar.
Stop running from your fears and face them.
This is news to some. But God loves you.
Alot.
Seriously.
Alot.
There are no words for it,
just trust me, and embrace it. :-)

Life is too short to waste time being afraid
Life is too short to waste time living for yourself.

That road is easy, but it is also empty.

But you already knew that.

So go.
Fix it.
Take whatevers dragging you down and kill it.
Take it out behind the woodshed and show it who's boss.
The rest of this blog will be here when you get back.
.
..
...
....
.....
....
...
..
.

All better?
Seriously. Get off the computer and go talk to yo Daddy. Not that Daddy.

Your Abba.

The straight narrow is sometimes difficult to find I know. But you have a guide.
(2 Samuel 22:29)



Ok now that we got that over with. Here's where I get all prophetic.


We (as in my target audience within my generation) are a broken generation.
At least 90% of my friends come from broken homes.
All of us have faced trials, faced the whole world tearing itself apart because it comes down to affecting each and every person in a way that breaks their hearts. But also fills them with a determination.

What happens when you get an ENTIRE GENERATION that is broken and wants nothing more than to FIX EVERYTHING that they have had to face?


REVOLUTION.

A revolution without music is a revolution not worth having.

God, the conductor, is tapping his baton on the music stand, the music has not even begun, he is just getting our attention, setting the rhythm for the Orchestra of Eternity.

The next generation will be the last, this generation is the leaders of the last gneration. Some of you who read this will not see death before you see the Son of God come across the sky.
Some of you will be great leaders.
Great teachers.
Pillars of the faith in your families and workplaces.
Some of you will be missionaries.
Some of you will be martyrs.

The Final Concerto is starting. God is moving, he is getting our attention, and soon.
The music starts.
You are in that orchestra, are you ready to play your part?

Isaiah 6
Philippians 3:14
Revelation 7:9-17

-Jason


P.S. Use your imaginations, and enjoy the V for Vendetta video. lol
Revelation 22:21